Law and Order: The Dead Investigation
When you look closely, you see dead people investigating their own corpses. Like a snatcher who gets snatched by death, a german dump who trashed the gay bully. We have the rock n’ roller who gets rolled, the tree that kills a nature hater, the sweet tooth that swallows the death out of himself, the greedy prankster that gets the axe, the trainer who gets milled, and a fake vampire that makes a big blood mess. So, don’t be bad or else you’ll end up on the next episode of 1000 Ways To Die. #81 Tree Of Death (AKA Freedom to Treedom): August 22, 1989/Fort Stockton, Texas. A nature hater named Qauna only likes the sun. She drives out into a forest. It was scorching hot and her car broke down. Qauna sits under a tree, what she does not know is that the tree she is sitting under is the Cerbera Odollam, one of the species of poisoned trees. She thought the poisoned fruit was mangoes and ate it. In a few hours, Qauna died of poisoning. #489 Shredmill (AKA The Work Of A Loud Treadmill): December 10, 1993/Port Stephen, Falkland Island. A trainer named John is addicted to treadmills. In a rainy day, John gets on the treadmill. But John doesn’t know his dog licked it. He slips on treadmill and goes under the treadmill. He gets shredded to death. #162 The Japilo Kerdas Story (AKA Lets Get Crazy): October 31, 2004/East Saint Paul, Canada. Japilo Kerdas is really a nice guy outside, but in his house its the opposite. With Screamo music all around Japilo, neighbors report him very often. When police are called, Japilo performs a ritual he calls “Kerdalice”. When police come to his house, awful Screamo music sets up on the policemen ears. They all leave when this ritual is performed. Japilo sets the music too loud during another ritual. The loud music destroys Japilo’s eardrum and makes him trippy. He falls onto a policeman and they mistake it for a attack. The police shoot Japilo dead. Next up, a sugar daddy has too much sugar, and the prankster that gets axed. #30 Die-A-Bet-Ic: April 10, 1993/Homer, Alaska. Dallas is a sugar daddy that loves sweets. Not have sex, but eat sweets all the time. He performed in a game called Candy Man. A person has to eat 20 candies in 10 seconds. The sugar daddy knew he was gonna win. But when the game was ended, Dallas ate all the sweets but died. Dallas’ died of diabetes. The host rushed Dallas to the ER, but it is too late. The host was charged of first degree murderer and goes to jail. #219 Wooden Pranked: November 8, 2007/Stalbe, Latvia. A prankster named Ralfs commits a murderer prank. He paints a ragdoll and puts it into the woods. He will put an axe on a tree with rope. When people see it they will come to police and tell. Ralfs will remove all the stuff to prove them wrong. When Ralfs came back to remove the stuff, the axe was swinging and decapitated Ralfs. His head flies onto a victim of Ralf’s pranks. Next up, a criminal gets kidnapped by death, and the bully that gets hard down in the dump. (I will complete this soon.)